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Purposely being ignored in social settings/Women hate me

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thejuice said:
Then other people are like the recording studio with all the inherent flaws that it has. It will only capture 'a version' of the band and not the real live experience.

Sometimes the technology is too unsophisticated to capture the nuance of the source material adequately. For example early jazz recordings.

So it's a misrepresentation, and so we are misinterpreted as stupid by neurotypicals. They can only judge us within the limitations of their own incompatible and imperfect hardware.
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Exactly! During the live performance it is experienced to the people playing the instruments in a way the listener won’t be able to experience fully . Each representation digested by us of the source will have their own interpretation of that performance, each individual will perceive it individually with their own likes and dislikes.
Their hardware is not flawed from their perspective because it is designed for data transfer within their module only.But we will be seen as a flaw, but only because there is contrast .

We may see them as a flaw because our data is not transferred properly and incompatible with their module only because there is contrast .

So the question is why fill our lives with anxiety about it?It’s the environment which we a thrown into. That won’t change. Spend energy on things that give us pleasure, and find compatible modules that are able to transfer data with us .
 
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Human Avatar said:
Exactly! During the live performance it is experienced to the people playing the instruments in a way the listener won’t be able to experience fully . Each representation digested by us of the source will have their own interpretation of that performance, each individual will perceive it individually with their own likes and dislikes.
Their hardware is not flawed from their perspective because it is designed for data transfer within their module only.But we will be seen as a flaw, but only because there is contrast .

We may see them as a flaw because our data is not transferred properly and incompatible with their module only because there is contrast .

So the question is why fill our lives with anxiety about it?It’s the environment which we a thrown into. That won’t change. Spend energy on things that give us pleasure, and find compatible modules that are able to transfer data with us .
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Yes and to expand on your point, each instrumentalist on stage will have themselves louder than everyone else in their monitor, which could be an analogy on the objectivity and reliability of self awareness. Certainly the audience have a broader picture. A recording of a performance is a critical watershed moment for any musician.

Yes any deviation from the norm is usually seen in a negative light. Hence the general dislike or mistrust of show offs, creeps, experts, oddballs, scholars etc. Even the word 'deviant' itself is a pejorative isn't it.
Maybe a clashing of two distinct modules will have them question the way they problem solve life. We know most people aren't curious and find difference too distressing.
 
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Tony Ramirez said:
I hate small talk I hate it with a passion I never knew what small talk was until I started socializing 5 years ago I was wondering why I sucked at it I just hate it I think it's the stupidest thing I heard in my life and I can't believe NT's like doing that it's dumbest dumbest thing ever. I thought it was alone in this until I found out it was quite a common thing with autistic people.

You know it makes mad as even worse You're not even taught this in school or anything it's unwritten rule I think it's dumb how no one teaches you how to do small talking just normally normally normally naturally know how to do it but as an autistic I'll never taught it I don't know just never taught it and these people just naturally do it and I think it's really dumb and stupid.
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You probably radiate your attitude to the people you attempt to socialize with. You consciously or unconsciously convey your attitude that they are "dumb and stupid". They will try to change the subject of a conversation that you are attempting to dominate, and if that fails, they'll leave you. You don't own them, and they will not waste their time dealing with you.

People are extremely varied. Some like small talk. Others like discussing in depth a topic that interests them. The location and purpose of the socialization is a key factor. If you're at a casual church meetup or a having coffee in a cafe, Generally people will keep the conversation light and free flowing. They will have no interest in someone else's "trauma dumping" or a detailed monologue about your special interest. They get BORED with that, and they will move on.

I've never heard of a mainstream school teaching students how to engage in small talk. Perhaps you can find a seminar for autistics that teach such skills. Good luck.
 
Tony Ramirez said:
I don't like when I get interrupted during a conversation which happens all the time.
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Are you repetitive? Do you say the same thing over and over? Do you talk exclusively about yourself? Do you ask open-ended questions that encourage others to talk to you? Are you able to talk about anything other than just yourself? Do you have any interests other than yourself?

Please get therapy. I can't imagine why you still haven't found a therapist and made an appointment by now. What are you waiting for?
 
Tony Ramirez said:
I also like to stay on one topic deeply and find it annoying how neurotypicals will keep changing the subject to something stupid on the fly every few minutes. It's dumb stupid and quite annoying. I can never keep up and end up being out of the conversation by then and it's by myself alone every time.
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What you said above ^ is the reason why people run away from "conversations" with you.

No one is obligated to listen to you monologue about yourself and they do not want to. There are people who probably find you "dumb stupid and quite annoying" because you "like to stay one topic deeply". Casual conversations are not the way you want them to be and they never will be like that.

Please get therapy.
 
I was reassured the tough way emotionally by a woman from church going through issues I connected with and others who I disclosed my autism after she disclosed her disability that I am not purposely being ignored and that I was always the most important welcomed person there.
 
why are men afraid to talk to women - Google Suche

It even says that 90% yes that high are afraid to approach women. I even seen women online who actually think they are ugly when I think they are so beautiful but they complain they don't get asked out. When I read the comments the guys say that they are actually afraid to ask or approach her because she is actually attractive and they are afraid that she going to tear her head off. Humiliated and put the guy down.
 
l think the term " out of your league", meaning due to looks, social or economic status, that female or male maybe out of your league. l dated somebody out of my league, and because of that, l didn't take them seriously. But it was my type, and l still thi k about them though l don't call them anymore. And l spent a lot of time trying to breakup pretty much for that reason alone.
 
Aspychata said:
l think the term " out of your league", meaning due to looks, social or economic status, that female or male maybe out of your league. l dated somebody out of my league, and because of that, l didn't take them seriously. But it was my type, and l still thi k about them though l don't call them anymore. And l spent a lot of time trying to breakup pretty much for that reason alone.
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No this is not out of your territory this is actual men that are actually terrified to talk to women and these are women that actually think they are ugly they are actually terrified to talk to men so no you are totally wrong in this.
jsilver256 said:
Here is a link to therapists accepting medicaid.
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To bring up a dead horse again we are actually looking into therapists now and we're starting to get this started my father's looking into it so we are starting this is going to happen soon.
 
That's fantastic news Tony, really excited for you. l am sorry if you feel let you down.
 
Now it hit me. Especially now after seeing couples with big families. Now it hit me this weekend this Sunday was a facade a faker. Same old crap.

I thought single women cared and talked for me but now I realize that's a bunch of bull let me explain when I went to the morning church the woman that approached me now I see that she was pregnant of course she's married that's the only reason why she talked to me.

Now I realize after service the only person that approached me was this guy who was married of course like I needed another guy friend who was married like I need a little hole in the head then of course the couple that I end up making state to the church the two friends that ended up talking to actor of course and I realized one is married that's the reason why she's nice to me and the other one I'm pretty definitely sure the reason why she's nice to me cuz she has a boyfriend I just know she has a boyfriend she's nice to me that's why they we hung out a little bit after.

No I realize that group The only people that were actually talk to me the only woman that were there that actually acknowledge existed were married and the two women there that I know that were single even the one I sat next to wouldn't even give me the time or date even when we actually play the game against the game of which we were going to play she pretty much ignored my ass and didn't say nothing but nothing nothing to me and just talk to everyone else but all the married women there acknowledge I talk to me and even said my name but everyone else that was single ignoring my ass so now I realize it's the same old crap as usual.

Are we going to the evening church and I know for a fact that the woman that I felt left out on and this was helping me and felt you know sad too I pretty sure I heard her say in the background husband so I'm pretty damn sure she has a husband so that's the only reason why she's nice to my ass and I know the other one who causes married the one that was approach to be at the greeting which I'm friends with her husband like I need another damn couple and I know the other one that I met that got me into the church I don't see who she has a boyfriend that's the only one and she's nice to my ass so it costs the same old crap.

When I go on and counter any women they don't give me the time or day I know they're single and I know if I encounter any other people the only ones that going to approach the other ones that are married or in relationships it's the same old crap like I always wanted to couples couples couples damn couples couples couples and if I hit a damn women say or damn men say my boyfriend my husband my boyfriend my husband I'm going to show it up their damn ass too I'm sick of it I'm tired of it and then I'm tired of life and I'm tired of everything else I'm tired of every damn couple I'm tired every damn person that's married I'm tired of them all I'm tired of their kids shoving their kids up in their face I'm sick of it all I'm sick of life I wish I was dead and I wish everyone else I wish the whole world will blow up I was sick of everyone and everything that's it.
 
Hey, this comes from a place of compassion.
You are not well Tony. You appear to be having a manic episode of some kind.
From your writings and posts it seems you are always searching for a woman. This is obvious to everyone here, and everyone you meet. You seem to be using church as a way to cruise for women. The folks there can probably recognize this and that might explain the interactions you have there.
I have said before that you need to fix yourself before you can offer anything to a woman.
Please get help for this unhealthy obsession with getting a girl. You are in no condition to do anything for a woman except damage them or their emotions with your behavior.
You are not entitled to a woman. You have to earn the chance to find one by becoming a healed person or already on a real path to healing. Please seek help, like this moment. Be well
 
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If you read the comments, It says that most men don't 'cold approach" woman any more. It says women approach men if they are interested.. So maybe it helps to read what other men are saying. Also, one guy said he was too intimidated to approach her. That means she may be out of his league.
 
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Yes i think this in USA is true, women were all the time saying 'creep get out of here' 'don't look at me' with the metoo etc too, and the sexual accusations in the job, etc, there were men who stopped to help women with a car, or drowning or something and they were even taken to court or called police etc, then now men are starting to don't even bother approaching or helping women. And even stopping talking to them on job, or riding on elevators. Or this is what a lot people say anyway on the internet i don't live there.
 
Tony, you need to stop internalizing what other woman are doing or what you think they are doing. It's a free world, and they have zero obligation to talk to anyone. There are men that l am not interested in talking to, and they just go on to someone else. Just as you have a right to ignore woman you don't like. It's called free will, the ability to decide who we wish to be with. Just because you show up, the young woman is not obligated to socialize with you. This misconception you have is why we are all asking you to speak to a therapist, because you can't seem to grasp this.
 
Aspychata said:
Tony, you need to stop internalizing what other woman are doing or what you think they are doing. It's a free world, and they have zero obligation to talk to anyone. There are men that l am not interested in talking to, and they just go on to someone else. Just as you have a right to ignore woman you don't like. It's called free will, the ability to decide who we wish to be with. Just because you show up, the young woman is not obligated to socialize with you. This misconception you have is why we are all asking you to speak to a therapist, because you can't seem to grasp this.
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Grasp this for the millionth time they only I said only talk to me if they are in a relationship aka boyfriend or husband.
 
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